Slaxxxer has uploaded a video today about an argument he had
and how it has led him to introspection about expressing feelings, see: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d99Eeg7D7y8.
It's uncanny because I feel in a very similar situation. All today I have had the
strange feeling that everybody is attacking me at once and it's put me in a
strange mood. As I say to the skeptics: "I may be a paranoid conspiracy
theorist, but being paranoid doesn't mean everybody isn't out to get me!"
There are two cases in particular I want to detail. I was contacted a few days
ago on Facebook (so begins a million argument stories!) by a total stranger who
claimed she was engaged to be married to the son of a lady I know, somebody who
I really like and respect. I was a bit alarmed because I didn't recognize this
person but I checked with my friend and she confirmed that this was indeed her
daughter-in-law-to-be. My friend is celebrating her fortieth wedding
anniversary this Sunday. Then the daughter-in-law-to-be sent me a message
confiding in me that she had a surprise present planned for my friend and asked
me to help. Unfortunately I misunderstood and inadvertently ended up revealing
the secret to my friend. I apologized to the daughter-in-law-to-be, but she was
absolutely furious. She said: "Thanks
a lot for ruining that surprise!... If you misunderstood you could have
asked!... What a shame, you have ruined what was a lovely idea and took me a
lot of time and effort... You really did mess that up! You just need to engage
your brain... So gutted!" Beyond my apology there was not a lot I
could say. I had indeed done that. But then this tirade continued. When I merely
posted a comment saying: "Congratulations! Have a great day!" on a
formal and public notice issued by my friend and her husband, the
daughter-in-law-to-be posted an angry emoji below it. I deleted the comment.
The daughter-in-law-to-be is behaving as if I have deliberately sabotaged my
friend's celebration out of malicious intent. No, I would never do that. It was
an honest mistake and I'm sorry. At the very same time I had a comment on one
of my posts from an intermittent friend whom I last saw in 2011. He and I came
across each other a few times before at David Icke forum meet-ups. He is the kind
of person who is always very courteous in real life, but online he can behave
like he did this time. His comment was sarcastic, bitchy and subtly abusive.
This is not the first time he's done this kind of thing. A few years ago I was
politely debating with somebody and he waded in with his size 12's with the
snide comment: "Clutching at straws, Ben." These two incidents happened
within about an hour of each other. I snapped. Maybe it's because of the Larry
Warren business (See: http://hpanwo-voice.blogspot.co.uk/2017/07/the-larry-warren-controversy-part-18.html),
but my tolerance levels have taken a battering recently. My professional
decorum has its limits. The good news is that hospital portering has taught me
a hard but very worthwhile lesson on how to disarm antagonists like this: The
Dignity Statement. See the background links below for more details. I explain
how to use it, when to use it and, when used correctly, how effective it is at
retaliating against enemies in an ethical manner. I've found it useful in my
post-portering life on several occasions, although not as often as when I was in
portering. This is one of these occasions. So I have done something that goes
against the grain a bit, but I know in the long run it will make me feel a lot
better. The first thing I did was to send them the lyrics to a porters' song.
Porters' Dignity
Porters' Dignity
Porters' Dignity
And Porters' Dignity
Porters' Dignity
Oh, Porters' Dignity
Porters' Dignity
And Porters' Dignity
Porters' Pride
Porters' Pride
Porters' Pride
And Porters' Pride
Porters' Pride
Oh, Porters' Pride
Porters' Pride
And Porters' Pride
You can hear me singing that song at the end of this HPANWO
Show: http://hpanwo-radio.blogspot.co.uk/2014/12/programme-114-podcast-marcus-allen-part.html.
After that I blocked them before they had the chance to reply. Childish you
might think? Just how mature are we meant to be and for how long? Who benefits
when we turn the other cheek again and again and again to aggressive and
exploitative emotional vampires and hashtag pugilists who are all smiles when
you meet them in person and then snipe and gripe at you from behind their keyboards
and monitors?... They do! So I'm taking some time off from being Mr
cool-calm-and-collected ex-porter. I've gone on to do the same to two other
people. One is the person who unfriended me for daring to disagree with him
over Dr Judy Wood, see: http://hpanwo-voice.blogspot.co.uk/2013/09/the-911-civil-war.html.
The other is the co-host of a skeptic radio show I was once on. He unfriended
me when he joined the Anti-Darren Perks Cult, see: http://hpanwo-voice.blogspot.co.uk/2014/02/miragemengate.html.
This was when I was striving on the futile effort to engage these people in
rational debate. While I was presenting my rational case he posted: "Ben,
stop prevaricating." I know, the last two cases are things that happened
years ago and I'm still angry about
it. Isn't that petty of me? Maybe Slaxxxer is right and the reason I'm still
angry after so much time has passed is because I did not react correctly at the
time. I've found that I can't just brush these feelings off; they fester. Perhaps
this way I can find peace. I myself feel uncertain about what I've done. Many
people will say that it's out of character for me. Maybe, but if my character
includes biting my tongue and suffering in silence, then perhaps it is a flaw
not a quality.
See here for
background: http://hpanwo-tv.blogspot.co.uk/2010/11/making-dignity-statements.html.
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