I know what it is like to live as a hospital porter without
dignity statements because I did so for the first few years of my career. I
describe two experiences from that period here: https://hpanwo-hpwa.blogspot.com/2024/01/how-dare-you.html
and: https://hpanwo-hpwa.blogspot.com/2024/01/well-take-it-from-here.html.
There were many others. Deep down, maybe I should be grateful for those dark
days because without them would there be a HPWA at all? What is it like to
endure twenty-three years of that nightmare? I'm glad I never found out. But
how do HP's who don't know about the dignity statement cope? What about those
who positively reject it, for a recent example see: https://hpanwo-hpwa.blogspot.com/2024/02/it-doesnt-work.html?
You can just bite your tongue and take it, but is that healthy? The brilliant
2003 comedy film Anger Management has
Jack Nicholson, in one of his best performances, playing a psychotherapist. In
one scene he tells one of his patients: "There
are two kinds of angry people in this world, explosive and implosive. Explosive
is the kind of individual you see screaming at the cashier for not taking their
coupons. Implosive is the cashier who remains quiet day after day and finally
shoots everyone in the store." Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sw24BjNsnkw.
You'll be relieved to know that I've never witnessed a HP shooting anybody in a
hospital, but I have seen them blow their fuses and start shouting at the top
of their voice, sometimes throwing objects around in their fury; and I've seen
some civilians doing the same. Psychologists use a lot of physical metaphors
when referring to emotion, like "bottling up" and "letting it
out". What about the perfect stoic who bites his tongue for his entire
career? I knew a porter who was six months away from retirement and he
transformed into a docile sheep. As a result the rest of his section, and the civilians,
used him as a walking punch-bag. We knew it was because he was just biding his
time, running the calendar down; longing for that happy day when he walked out of
the lodge for the last time. But memories of humiliation can torment; I've felt
them. Injustice without recourse is a mental torture, and like all very intense
negative emotions, it can lead to depression and post-traumatic stress that can
cause physical ailments. I often wonder how much that man really enjoyed his
retirement.
I know you'll sometimes hear phrases like "rise above
it!" and "water off a duck's back!", but how honest is that? I
also know many people who forgive their abusers, either from a sense of duty
because of a religious belief or as a way to find personal peace. However,
there is a shadow to that desire for peace. The philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche
pointed out that abusers never forgive their victims, it is only the victim who
has to forgive their abuser; and he believed this was fundamentally an
expression of powerlessness. For a person without power at the mercy of another
who is cruel and sadistic, you have to forgive for your own selfish needs, to
avoid the only alternative which is to sit and seethe in ineffectual rage for
your entire life. It was a part of what he called "slave morality".
Source: https://fdrpodcasts.com/5412/how-to-never-be-bullied.
In a hospital, being the type who screams at the cashier is not an option
either, it will quickly get you discharged. People like that also have trouble
holding down a civvy job. The only option is the dignity statement. It is the
most gratifying revenge of all, and the most potent because it includes total
impunity. It leads to the most sublime inner peace in a situation fraught with even
the worst structural violence. There is no valour in false modesty; I believe I
have made a world-changing breakthrough, one that can brighten up the lives or
all my brother and sister porters; and anybody else who chooses to try it. If
any readers disagree and think they have a better solution, feel free to let me
know.
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