They Understand

 

Some people seem to have a desperate need for attention. I'm not just talking about the child who breaks things so that their parents will notice them or the husband who plants gaslighting clues to antagonize his wife. I don't even mean the unpleasant characters among the staff and patients that we hospital porters have to deal with every day. I mean strangers you interact with casually whom you somehow always know are going to get in your face. The reasons why vary, but they are all manufactured. Sometimes it's for profit, for example see: https://hpanwo-tv.blogspot.com/2020/10/argument-with-homeless-person.html. At other times it's just for social capital or simply energy vampirism. They will start talking loudly in a shopping queue or come up to you on a park bench to talk about anything. I've encountered such people who walk dogs. It is true that some dogs are badly behaved, for whatever reason, and therefore the owners have to keep them on a lead and avoid contact with other dogs. The problem is that some of them go on to believe that they actually own the thirty square feet of space around them in a public area. I have encountered a few of these myself and one of them has been walking my patch for the last week or two. He's a middle-aged man with a medium sized grey English Bulldog. Contrary to their popular image, English Bullies are often very gentle and affectionate dogs; it all depends on their upbringing and training. They are not often used as guard dogs. This man's dog seems to be quite happy with humans and has even acted in a friendly manner towards me, but he hates other dogs. He lunges at them and barks. I have enough experience to know that I should keep the dogs I'm walking at a distance. The dogs also know how to take a hint and back off. The issue is that the Bulldog's owner has turned this matter into a gigantic pose. Whenever I approach he shrinks away to one side in an exaggerated manner as if I am some kind of monster with a pet dragon. He is clearly implying that the situation is my fault. I sometimes come across his wife walking the same dog and she is similar in her attitude. A few days ago I was walking down a narrow wooded cycle track when I saw him with his dog coming round the bend. He froze as he usually does and stood back, waiting for me to pass. My own two dogs were busy sniffing a patch of grass enthusiastically so I didn't move. The man kept staring at me, staying where he was, obviously suggesting that I was holding him up, even though there was plenty of room for him to walk past me on the other side of the track. I didn't react; I just kept watching my own dogs and ignoring him. I didn't even look at him. Eventually he resorted to asking me in an irritable tone: "Are you coming past or what?" I responded: "I'm walking at my own pace. This is a public highway, sir." The man then gave up and strutted past. I knew it was likely I would meet him again; I always come across the same group of people who use that area to walk their dogs. Sure enough, yesterday he appeared again close to the same place. This time I completely ignored him, but as I passed him I began singing one of my porters' songs. As is often the case with dig-states, I never planned this. It was spontaneous and just felt right, see the background links below. By then he was a dozen yards away from me, but I distinctly heard him mutter: "Oh fuck off!"
 
I doubt that this person was ever a HP. I definitely do not recognize him from our community. My por-dar was silent, sweeping smoothly without any blips at all. Yet he knew immediately what I was doing. As I've said previously, my idea of dig-states has had many critics, see: https://hpanwo-hpwa.blogspot.com/2024/02/it-doesnt-work.html. According to my detractors, the kind of people whom I consider valid targets for dig-states would never understand them, therefore it's a waste of time trying to make them. Well, as we've seen, that's not true. I've just done a dig-state maybe the fourth or fifth in my civilian life. It was made against a target who is probably a lifelong civilian himself. Yet it struck home. He knew what I was doing. He understood it. I saw him again today. This time we were in the middle of a large park. He stood to one side with his back to me and I just walked past without a word. I know enough about dignity statements to realize that they lose their power if you overuse them.
See here for background: https://hpanwo-hpwa.blogspot.com/2024/03/a-hps-life-without-dignity-statements.html.
And: https://hpanwo-hpwa.blogspot.com/2017/11/fantastic-dignity-statement.html.